Compensating

[carol]

I had my 18yo son evaluated last summer because my younger son has dyslexia. My older son always had academic problems in school being retained 2 times. When he was in 4th grade, he was tested (not by a psychologist) and found to be 2 years behind in reading and 1 and a half years behind in math. He as never caught up as I was told he would do. He is only a sophomore. He seems to try hard, but never really gets it. The eval identified some areas that were below average, but she did not find him with an exceptionality. She said he probably has some reading disorder when he was younger, had he been tested might have been dx. She could only make him eligible for a 504. When my son got the results of the testing he was disappointed, because if he did indeed have dyslexia, it would explain a lot of things for him. Now, he feels like the only explanation for his poor grades is that he is dumb. My question is, "Does he have dyslexia and just learned to compensate?" Can adults be diagnosed with dyslexia? He still mispronounces some words, has trouble reading words he has never seen or has to sound out, has trouble with main idea and comprehension. His spelling is adequate but nowhere near someone of his age. He continues to be frustrated because he gets Cs, Ds, and Fs. After someone has compensated, is it possible to get some kind of tutoring to help with the issues at hand? I wish I would have known then what I know now. Thanks for listening.

[charliegirl]

I think they denied your son fape. I'm sure Lillian will have some questions for you to help her understand just where your son stands. She knows a lot about dyslexia and evaluations. She did get her son an IEP in the face of much opposition.

[misty]

It could be another language arts LD . Except for the comprehension part, my daughter had all those symptoms & she was DXed with a Language arts LD. She went to learning support for 2 years (she has an IEP for that & her math LD) & she did indeed improve! Matter of fact just 2 weeks ago they moved her to a regular English class & she's thriving!

[carol]

Right now, he attends a very academic, college bound high school and struggles profusely. He got in because his middle school had a watered-down education and he got As Bs. He does not want to move high schools, but he is frustrated to the point of a mild depression. He wants to do drama and other activities and cannot because his grade point average is too low. I have tried to establish a plan B for junior year because our local neighborhood high school is a war zone and Anthony is sheltered and not "street" at all. Before I knew education system, I tended to move Anthony to a different placement because I could not get help in a charter school. I kept asking questions, but did not have the "gung ho" attitude I have now. I feel like I failed him. My husband says no. He says we did the best we could, and Anthony would not be in the best high school in our city if I did not work with him (carry him) all this time. I cannot help him in this high school. The work is too advanced for me now as I have not done this type of work in years. Some kids want to drop out of school and get GED. Anthony wants to stay in school and have his high school experience even if he will be 20 when he graduates.

[charliegirl]

You can request a complete educational eval or one that covers the areas of concern from your school district even if he is in private school. Once you have that, you could arrange for him to receive help in the areas he needs it in. Because he isn't in public school I think they don't need to provide it so you would have to pay but at least you could be getting him help.

If it is still a public school, he should be able to get the help he needs with an IEP or 504. Obviously his 504 isn't working and needs changes which you can figure out after an eval.

A school that tough is a good training ground for the future. If he is passing, even though its barely, he is a hard worker and has good study habits. Getting him the help he needs may really open doors for him.

[jmb3]

:-/I feel bad for your child. Yes! they do compensate for there week areas. My son hates to write/read, he compensates by using audio skill. He is able to recite stuff back practically word perfect!

High school is much more demanding. I agree, get a full evaluation testing.

Find your child's strengths and build on them. He is not dumb. He just learns differently. He probably has a few deficits, but that doesn't make him stupid. Please be sure to explain that to him.

Perhaps, finding a tutor to help explain some techniques that could help him see what's important. Showing how to read the bold letters, finding the main idea etc. I know this is covered at the earlier grades, perhaps he missed it. A review at this age might help.

He might have trouble comprehending because it takes him so much effort just to decode the words, that he forgets what he reads. (In this case, Wilson or some other muti-sensory reading program would probably help. )

If he is an audio learner, ie, he can remember/understand what he hears, you can request books on tape for his classes. Yes, you can do this in a 504 plan b/c this helps him on area of weakness. and Listening is a strength.

You might be able to let him into drama even tho his grades aren't high. I forget the exact reasoning, but it was something about about having a learning issues shouldn't keep you out of the extra programs the school provides.



Using a computer to type his papers should be allowed, if he isn't using one already. This will help with spelling.

Be sure to praise him for the little things he does. Including being nice, polite, doing his normal stuff w/o issues, etc.

Don't be hard on yourself. You are doing the best you can with what you are given. That's the best any parent can do. Decisions/priorities change as the circumstances change.
Being open minded and trying to help is wonderful. This is takes time and patience. One day at a time.

Good luck.

[carol]

My son attends Central High School which is the highest academic school in my city. I really think the complex nature of this school is too much for him. He squeaks by every quarter with major effort and his is still two years younger than the other kids in his school. I have an eval on him done independently by a psychologist. She qualified him for a 504, but his school will not offer him more than extra time on tests, because he really does not have to be there. It is a public magnet school for college bound academic students. It is also very populated. I have been making phone calls and managed to possibly get him placement in our small, alternate neighborhood public school. The education is not as college bound and it is very close to our home. If he has to stay after for tutoring, he can stay and not have to travel the distance he does now. I also think they will make the accommodations, if necessary. When he went to our public middle school, his grades were better. The education was a little less complex and his weaknesses were not as pronounced as they seem to be in a highly academic, college-bound school very much invested in keeping the numbers up (standardized test scores) in their school then the kids that truly are struggling. It is a very, "survival of the fittest attitude in this school." I don't want him being frustrated. I just do not think the school is a good fit for him. Unfortunately, he really likes the school climate and does not want to leave. Had he been properly tested when he was younger, I don't think I would not have had to find several placements for him over the years. I think a smaller learning environment where he has more successes would be a better fit. Now, I have to convince him of this.

Thank you all for your suggestions. I will digest each and every one of them. It is so comforting knowing there are people who really do care in the world.

[charliegirl]

I hope you can convince him a smaller, less intense school is good. He has been managing ok in the larger, more challenging school so I wouldn't be surprised if his grades improve in the other school. That will be good for his self esteem.

[lillian]

Carol,

I agree with your belief that his current school is not a good placement for him academically. I, too, think it's a good idea to try and get him into the other school you mentioned that is closer to your home. If he wants to stay in school for the high school experience, that's his choice. He's eighteen, so he's an adult and can make that decision. Personally, I think he might enjoy a good community college more, for community colleges are really beginning to step in and pick up the slack for young adults like your son. They have all kinds of free tutoring programs available, educational testing for LD's, classes that can be taken online (less stress for many of our kids), etc. Also, as long as he can afford to buy it himself, he can use just about any type of assistive technology (AT) he wants to use--laptop, tape recorder, calculator (required in many college math classes, not an accommodation, as it often is in high school)--and AT will really help him. Perhaps, he should visit a community college or two to see what he thinks?

As far as testing him for dyslexia, I have a fourteen-year-old son, who has been dxed with dyslexia by one of the top diags in the state, who specializes in dxing dyslexia, and who has been told he does not have dyslexia by one of the top LD researchers in the world, who researches for the National Institutes of Health. The label of dyslexia is, IMHO, the most controversial label in Special Education, which mystifies me, but after years of being told my son does and doesn't have dyslexia, and hearing all the fighting that goes on in the dyslexia community as to what the actual definition of the disorder is, I roll my eyes. As Jmb said so well, concentrate on your son's strengths. Let him use his strengths to compensate for his weaknesses. Give him AT to help him. There are some really fantastic computer programs out there to help struggling readers and writers. AT "rocks my son's world"!

If you want to get into the dyslexia definition, I will tell you this: When looking at educational testing, dyslexia is defined in the scientific community by letter/word identification below the 25th percentile, pseudoword decoding below the 25th percentile, and very poor spelling that is not phonetic. In addition, the student often has very low reading fluency scores.

Anyone at any age can be remediated for dyslexia. It's never too late. If you have a Scottish Rite in your area, I suggest calling them to see if they have testing and remediation for adults. My understanding is that some Scottish Rite Centers offer testing and tutoring for adults, while others do not. If they don't, they probably can lead you to an organization that does.

[carol]

I agree with everything you said. I had him tested. The psychologist said he probably had some type of reading disorder in elementary school. He would have been diagnosed had I had him tested then. I think the areas in which he was below average all combined makes for a struggling picture especially in an all academic school. It is difficult convincing him to change schools because he has changed a couple of times and he knows he is in the best school in our city and feels like he is a failure. I tried to tell him that this school just is not the best fit for him. Right now, I am worried about him. He is clearly depressed and frustrated. I watched frustration damage my other son and I can recognize it a mile away. He seems to be warming up to the idea of switching schools. I might suggest he seek counseling if he wants to talk to someone. You know, the eval I had on my son was a complete psychoeducational eval. Based on the testing, she also said he was clinically anxious. I knew this. He has had many obstacles my other two children did not since he has a different father and that caused many other unnecessary problems in his life. I will heed all your advice and keep you posted.
Thank you.