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Post by anon4now on Jun 17, 2008 10:47:58 GMT -5
Shoplifting and paranoia to my son's layers.  He says he knows kids are talking about them, so he follows them around the playground. And he's been stealing candy bars from grocery stores while I pay. He then is eating them without covering the sugar with his insulin, so his sugars have been out of whack too. Just thought I would share, since you all are becoming part of my long journey with this condition. Anon |
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Post by charliegirl on Jun 17, 2008 11:52:28 GMT -5
Many kids try stealing candy and since your son has diabetes and candy is restricted from his diet, I can understand why he would do it. I think that if you have to take him to the store with you he should have to go through the checkout ahead of you then stand at the end until you are done. It would make it harder for him to take something without you seeing him. If possible, don't take him with you. If you have to and catch him taking any or with any later, make him take it back and apologize. Store owners don't like prosecuting kids so as long as they know the parent is dealing with the kid, its very unlikely that they would do more than give him a good talking to and scare him about what will happen if he is caught. Is there any way you can incorporate sweets into his diet in a limited way, enough so that he isn't feeling deprived? Can he have the sugar free candy? I know its made with fruit juices and fruit sweeteners so it still has to be factored into his diet but could that be a possibility? Could you regulate his insulin to compensate for an occasional treat? I know other parents who have had to deal with their kids being diabetic and not allowed to eat foods that most kids think are necessary. I've even known diabetic adults who snuck treats to the detriment of their health. I feel so bad for you and him both. It just isn't fair that some kids have to suffer and can't just live like all the other kids. Unfortunately, life isn't fair and there is nothing we can do other than to help them adapt as much as possible.  |
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Post by anon4now on Jun 17, 2008 12:58:10 GMT -5
CG. We've already decided not to bring him if not absolutely necessary. We've done this in the past when the ADHD was out the most, and he was running up and down aisles etc. If I do have to take him, I will keep a close eye on him and keep him in front of me. It's first time offense, so shame on him. 2nd time, shame on me.
I'm thinking I'm going to have him withdraw money from his account, and bring him to the store manager to apologize and pay for the stolen candy.
As far as incorporating it into his diet. I know I say "No" more than "Yes" and he can't wrap that around his brain (That Yes does come out, just not every time). He doesn't ask more because he "knows" it will be no. I refrain because I know it will reak (sp?) havoc on his sugar levels for 3 hours. But I have said yes. Just recently I got him Oreo Cookie Cakes. And I bought him cookies for school lunches. And we just bought dad a "daddy's day cake" that the kids are eating more of, then dad. So he's not deprived at all lol. Most times, he begging for watermelon and canteloupe. Those just won't fit in his pocket LOL.
Thanks for your thoughts,
Anon
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Post by bugsmom on Jun 17, 2008 20:14:21 GMT -5
Awww...Anon, it's just tough sometimes isn't it? I know its got to be rough with the diabetes. I think he just wanted something he knew he couldn't have and took it. I'm sure it had to be very disappointing for you. My Josh is anaphylactic to all dairy. When he was very young I had to teach him that if he had anything with milk in it he could die. It was tough, but it was the truth. I didn't want to scare him, but I needed him to know it was serious. From the time he could talk he learned not to ever take food unless I checked it for dairy. I think it's got to be harder for your son because he knows what it tastes like and likes it. I feel for you because mine doesn't know what he's missing. Hang in there...I know how tough it is. |
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Post by jill on Jun 19, 2008 6:30:00 GMT -5
I feel for the kid for when things are restricted it makes it more tempting I too am a diabetic. Some candy can be eaten but in moderation which is hard for a kid to understand and will not preach to the child for I am not good at caring for myself and got yelled at by the doctor yesterday.
As for the stealing if you have to take him shopping do a body search before leaving check hands pockets etc. and make him own up to stealing and apologize to the worker. The embarrassment may be enough to stop stealing or if the manager gave him a scare lecture.
And for paronia kids may be talking about him kids are mean yes your son is suffering through a lot lately.
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Post by jj on Jun 19, 2008 8:57:07 GMT -5
I think everyone covered the candy stealing and I think you have that pretty much figured out on how to handle it from this point on. I think almost every kid will try stealing at least once.
As far as the paranoia, maybe he isn't paranoid. Maybe they really are talking about him (them?) but I'm not sure what good following them around would do. Maybe ask him specifically what "they" are saying and why he thinks following them will help. Perhaps he thinks if he is nearby they won't talk about him?
Anyway, I'm sorry you have these added things to worry about.
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Post by anon4now on Jun 19, 2008 12:10:45 GMT -5
I think everyone covered the candy stealing and I think you have that pretty much figured out on how to handle it from this point on. I think almost every kid will try stealing at least once. As far as the paranoia, maybe he isn't paranoid. Maybe they really are talking about him (them?) but I'm not sure what good following them around would do. Maybe ask him specifically what "they" are saying and why he thinks following them will help. Perhaps he thinks if he is nearby they won't talk about him? Anyway, I'm sorry you have these added things to worry about. He's made a lot of claims about the kids in school. No one likes him, they talk about him, they stare at him, they get him in trouble on purpose (hmmmm....). I've talked to the teacher (who is awesome and I'm going to miss her next year) and she says there is no evidence of any of those claims. She says he's a goofy kid that loves the attention in the class. One of the "treats" she offers to the kids is to pick a student to sit next to for the day, and 9 out of 10 times, they pick to sit next to him. I actually just met up with the class yesterday at the park near my work to say hi, and he had 4 girls and 2 boys sitting next to him and talking to him. They all asked him, "Is that your mom!?" with no kind of "OMG, is your mom here? what a nerd." And the teacher said that my son offers so much to the class, he gets the quiet kids to discuss topics. She teamed him up in a science project with one of the quiet kids, and instead of my son blurting out the answer, he told the kid the answer and that kid would say it. So it's not like my poor "weird" kid is sitting in the corner scribbling on the desk while they shoot spit balls at him lol. Anon |
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Post by thousandsofvoices on Jun 20, 2008 6:37:11 GMT -5
I use to shoplift as a child.  I can not tell you why cause I don't know it. It was like game to me. I shoplifted sweets only. until store owner catch me in. I was sooooo embarrassed, he said he knew my grandpa and that he will tell him about. I cried, begged him not to tell, and I swore I will never ever shoplift again. I kept my promise for all those years. I wanted to share this with you cause maybe he isn't aware of what he is doing at all, (even you think he should be) or if someone scare him like it happened to me it wouldn't happen ever again.  |
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Post by lcdc1 on Jun 20, 2008 9:13:03 GMT -5
stealing, yeah, just have some consequences for it that will hit home with him and maybe try that hard candy fro diabetics once in ahwile as a treat for doing well.
As for the kids talking, you know it would be wierd for any kids not to say stuff about each other, they all do it, mostly not vicious at a young age - as they get older it can be nasty. Maybe your son is just taking it too personally? Often times people with ADHD and other stuff will take things personally. I think it is a symptom of low self esteem in some, insecurity in others, frustration, and so on....
I was the class clown, I am still a big joker at times, it is my way of compensating at times. Just talk to your boy and tell him even if they are saying things, it is not always personal and teach him ways to cope on his side. If they are not saying things about him, he is dealing with issues anyway and wants input to say, Your OK, your a good kid just learning to deal with some stuff - good luck with it all and just be there for him and show him in positive ways there are better options than he is choosing right now.
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Post by jj on Jun 20, 2008 17:19:14 GMT -5
Gosh, Anon. After your last post I have no idea why he is saying they are talking about him. I'm befuddled. Maybe since he does indeed get a lot of attention and kids like him then maybe when they don't pay attention to him he thinks something is wrong...and yes, that is a little bit paranoid.
I'm so glad to hear he is well liked all around. I think that is wonderful!
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I was about to conquer the world but then I got distracted by something shiny.
