Post by misty on Jan 7, 2007 15:13:21 GMT -5
jill.................... Thread Started on Sept 8, 2006, 12:55pm
She will not play by herself and will force a toy into my hand or lap and demand I play with her. When I schedule special playtime it is indefenant she will never let you end it without a fight. Last night she told me "play with me or i will kick you" which ended up in a time out where I had to hold her down, to a meltdown, etc. End result there was no play time with mom. What she needs is a good friend we are trying. The girl from school who actually lives not far from here she likes most is hard to set up playdates and they are not even together in class anymore. The girls parents got divorced and mom and dad work 3rd shift opposite days so when do you call them? My daughter is lonely no girls on our street for her.
unicorn-tiff'smom
Tiff has always had a hard time playing by herself. I've always been told that it is an only child thing. Which I believe but only to a certain extent. Tiff has many, many other only children friends, who appear to be able to amuse themselves. I play with her all the time. And like you, sometimes, I just want to get some other stuff done early not wait until after 9pm all the time or waking up at 4:30am to get it done. Those are the times that Tiff has a hard time. She will go into her room and play school, or summer camp, or ice skating. She has done this since preschool. She relives the day by being the teacher and teaching what she learned that day to her "class". I have always felt unsure about it, but her therapist said it maybe another way she learns, by reinacting events.
To get back on track here. Jill, does she play with barbies or legos or do crafts by herself? Tiff only does sometimes. I spent so much money or barbie stuff, because I loved them. Hers sat unless a friend came over. So I finally gave it all away, even the huge house we had. She has so much stuff in her room that I have gotten so that she will play alone, but she doesn't unless like I said it is me or a friend.
Are there any other children in her class or grade that she would like to have over to give you some down time? We have no girls in our apt complex either. Just 3 boys and 2 are older and 1 is in her grade. She plays with them sometimes (bike riding and outside stuff). For girls I have to transport her to their houses or they come over, we all take turns. That gives Tiff others to play with instead of me all the time.
I hope that you can find that someone for your daughter. Until then she knows that you are her best friend. Tiff still calls me her best friend and it feels wonderful.
misty
My daughter was like that when she was younger too. Slowly (VERY slowly) she became able to play alone. I would start out playing with her & then tell her I'd be right back & I'd run & do something in another room. At first only maybe 5 minutes, gradually over months extending the time to 10, 15, 20 minutes. As she became used to that I started occassionally telling her no when she demanded I play. When she'd start whining that she COULDN't play alone, I'd remind her how nicely she did on her own the day before. It worked for me & my daughter. Shes 12 now & does fine on her own. I'm careful not to reject her pleas all the time & I make time for her each day to play a game, read together, draw, or even just talk or watch TV together.
She will not play by herself and will force a toy into my hand or lap and demand I play with her. When I schedule special playtime it is indefenant she will never let you end it without a fight. Last night she told me "play with me or i will kick you" which ended up in a time out where I had to hold her down, to a meltdown, etc. End result there was no play time with mom. What she needs is a good friend we are trying. The girl from school who actually lives not far from here she likes most is hard to set up playdates and they are not even together in class anymore. The girls parents got divorced and mom and dad work 3rd shift opposite days so when do you call them? My daughter is lonely no girls on our street for her.
unicorn-tiff'smom
Tiff has always had a hard time playing by herself. I've always been told that it is an only child thing. Which I believe but only to a certain extent. Tiff has many, many other only children friends, who appear to be able to amuse themselves. I play with her all the time. And like you, sometimes, I just want to get some other stuff done early not wait until after 9pm all the time or waking up at 4:30am to get it done. Those are the times that Tiff has a hard time. She will go into her room and play school, or summer camp, or ice skating. She has done this since preschool. She relives the day by being the teacher and teaching what she learned that day to her "class". I have always felt unsure about it, but her therapist said it maybe another way she learns, by reinacting events.
To get back on track here. Jill, does she play with barbies or legos or do crafts by herself? Tiff only does sometimes. I spent so much money or barbie stuff, because I loved them. Hers sat unless a friend came over. So I finally gave it all away, even the huge house we had. She has so much stuff in her room that I have gotten so that she will play alone, but she doesn't unless like I said it is me or a friend.
Are there any other children in her class or grade that she would like to have over to give you some down time? We have no girls in our apt complex either. Just 3 boys and 2 are older and 1 is in her grade. She plays with them sometimes (bike riding and outside stuff). For girls I have to transport her to their houses or they come over, we all take turns. That gives Tiff others to play with instead of me all the time.
I hope that you can find that someone for your daughter. Until then she knows that you are her best friend. Tiff still calls me her best friend and it feels wonderful.
misty
My daughter was like that when she was younger too. Slowly (VERY slowly) she became able to play alone. I would start out playing with her & then tell her I'd be right back & I'd run & do something in another room. At first only maybe 5 minutes, gradually over months extending the time to 10, 15, 20 minutes. As she became used to that I started occassionally telling her no when she demanded I play. When she'd start whining that she COULDN't play alone, I'd remind her how nicely she did on her own the day before. It worked for me & my daughter. Shes 12 now & does fine on her own. I'm careful not to reject her pleas all the time & I make time for her each day to play a game, read together, draw, or even just talk or watch TV together.
