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Post by katiekat on Apr 11, 2008 8:15:00 GMT -5
I really need a solution to this, I cannot take much more and feel like I am shortly going to go insane. Sean's non stop talking has got to be brought under control some how. I know it is not something that would be considered "bad" behavior or something that is punishable but it is seriously out of control and too much for anyone to handle. I have been dealing with this for years, hoping as he got older it would lessen but if anything it has gotten worse.
For one thing he narrates his entire day. Every little thought that pops into his head he must say aloud. For example: "My hands are sticky, I need a napkin, Im getting a napkin, I got a napkin, I'm wiping my hands, I wiped my hands, I'm throwing the napkin in the trash, I threw the napkin in the trash, the napkin is in the trash, my hands were sticky, I wiped my hands." This is not an exaggeration, and if you don't respond he will say it louder and repeat it again and again. He does this for pretty much every move he makes even yelling things downstairs from his room like "I'm changing the channel, I changed the channel" and so on.
He also will become obsessed and talk for hours about any small change made around the house. I have found myself actually hiding things from him because I know they will set him off. It does not matter how unimportant or small the situation is it will become something he has to go on and on about. For example-I bought different colored trash bags. Never even thought about it but Sean had to talk about it forever. "These are different colored trashbags, the trashbag was green before, this trashbag is white, Why did you put a white trashbag in here? Where did you get the white trashbags?" He probably made 100 comments about the stupid trashbag. He does this about everything from my new purse to the air freshner hanging on my rearview mirror, to a small branch that has fallen in the driveway.
Also, the more attention I pay to him the more it increases. It's like he cannot get enough and the more I talk to him or try to do something with him the more demanding of my attention he gets. He will become relentless and I literally feel harassed in my home home. If he hears me open the bathroom door, or come up from the basement he will run downstairs and start up. He will say things that are completely meaningless if he can't think of anything "real" to say. He will tell me 50x a day that he likes my shirt or ask what season it is. He will also make up nonsense things like yesterday I opened the bathroom door and there he was because he just needed to tell me"he was sweating like a pie."Huh?! I will admit I have actually "hidden" from him in my bathroom or the basement because I so desperately need a break from the talking.
In my research I have read that feeling pressure to talk is a symptom of ADHD, Bipolar, RAD, and Aspergers. All DXs that he has been given. I don't know how to handle it anymore, I have even had to start up "quiet time" again but he is not getting it and will yell things from his room every 30 seconds.
Any suggestions? Please help!
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Post by anon4now on Apr 11, 2008 11:35:28 GMT -5
Would he be interested in a journal or a tape recorder or even a video camera? Maybe he can make a scrap book with pictures etc.
It would still use some of your time up but this is the angle I'm thinking.
He has a lot on his mind and wants to communicate it with you. (or any audience). Maybe if you could start a small project with him like the camera and scrap book idea. So if he sees the different colored trash bag, he could snap a picture. Then you could print it and paste it on a piece of paper. Then he can write some of those comments. This trash bag is white. We usually have green. I like the green ones better. Then he could show you what he did and you could talk to him about it at that time. While he's working on it, give him cues like, I will hear all about it when your done.
I don't know if it will change anything. But it may focus those energies else where. And as always, it will be a work in progress.
If you give him a video camera, then he can do commentary on it. Tell him you can sit and watch it with him later. The only thing that would change is his need for a confirmation from you. Tell him you will hear it all on the video tape. Maybe as he gets older he'll think, gee I talk a lot. ;D
The other thought is looking into Art Therapy. It just seems like he wants to share with you and the only way he knows how at this point is to talk. If you start introducing other ways to share he might find one he likes better than talking.
Of course I'm way out of my league, but I thought I would give you my insights.
Anon
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Post by charliegirl on Apr 11, 2008 14:06:33 GMT -5
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Post by rakuflames on Apr 11, 2008 14:24:38 GMT -5
I really need a solution to this, I cannot take much more and feel like I am shortly going to go insane. Sean's non stop talking has got to be brought under control some how. I know it is not something that would be considered "bad" behavior or something that is punishable but it is seriously out of control and too much for anyone to handle. I have been dealing with this for years, hoping as he got older it would lessen but if anything it has gotten worse. For one thing he narrates his entire day. Every little thought that pops into his head he must say aloud. For example: "My hands are sticky, I need a napkin, Im getting a napkin, I got a napkin, I'm wiping my hands, I wiped my hands, I'm throwing the napkin in the trash, I threw the napkin in the trash, the napkin is in the trash, my hands were sticky, I wiped my hands." This is not an exaggeration, and if you don't respond he will say it louder and repeat it again and again. He does this for pretty much every move he makes even yelling things downstairs from his room like "I'm changing the channel, I changed the channel" and so on. He also will become obsessed and talk for hours about any small change made around the house. I have found myself actually hiding things from him because I know they will set him off. It does not matter how unimportant or small the situation is it will become something he has to go on and on about. For example-I bought different colored trash bags. Never even thought about it but Sean had to talk about it forever. "These are different colored trashbags, the trashbag was green before, this trashbag is white, Why did you put a white trashbag in here? Where did you get the white trashbags?" He probably made 100 comments about the stupid trashbag. He does this about everything from my new purse to the air freshner hanging on my rearview mirror, to a small branch that has fallen in the driveway. Also, the more attention I pay to him the more it increases. It's like he cannot get enough and the more I talk to him or try to do something with him the more demanding of my attention he gets. He will become relentless and I literally feel harassed in my home home. If he hears me open the bathroom door, or come up from the basement he will run downstairs and start up. He will say things that are completely meaningless if he can't think of anything "real" to say. He will tell me 50x a day that he likes my shirt or ask what season it is. He will also make up nonsense things like yesterday I opened the bathroom door and there he was because he just needed to tell me"he was sweating like a pie."Huh?! I will admit I have actually "hidden" from him in my bathroom or the basement because I so desperately need a break from the talking. In my research I have read that feeling pressure to talk is a symptom of ADHD, Bipolar, RAD, and Aspergers. All DXs that he has been given. I don't know how to handle it anymore, I have even had to start up "quiet time" again but he is not getting it and will yell things from his room every 30 seconds. Any suggestions? Please help! Does your son have AD/HD? My younger daughter was very hyperactive -- including her mouth. We got her on the right med and BANG all that chattering just STOPPED -- and she only talked when she had something to say. |
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Post by katiekat on Apr 11, 2008 14:49:52 GMT -5
Raku-He is diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar. He is also diagnosed with possible Aspergers or Reactive Attachment Disorder of Infancy. The psychiatrist and the therapist are not sure which so we do have an appt. this month with a neuropsych who specializes in Autism to see if we can get an answer.
He is currently on medication-Abilify and Trileptal. They have helped a lot with other issues but the talking continues and is probably worse than ever. In the past he was taking Depakote and Adderall but they had no effect on him.
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Post by jill on Apr 12, 2008 7:59:46 GMT -5
Annette does the same most days I just learned to respond and tune out. It depends on her mood.
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Post by jj on Apr 12, 2008 10:09:51 GMT -5
KK, I wouldn't be able to stand that either. I am one who loves silence.
I still think you should get some head phones for yourself that plays music or gives you white noise and make it clear to him that you won't take them off until your ready to listen. If he still wants to chatter at least you won't hear him.
I just don't know what else you could do. It does sound more and more like he has apergers or something in the autistic spectrum.
You said you may have to start punishment up for this. Did it work before? I don't see anything wrong with asking him to be silent for x amount of time just so you can have a break and sending him to his room if he breaks the silence.
If I lived closer I'd come give you a break but I have a feeling I'd be calling you to come back within an hour.
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Post by bugsmom on Apr 12, 2008 14:21:45 GMT -5
Kk, you must be going insane! I swear, you are the strongest women I know. I can't wait for Sean to get his new evaluation. Make sure you write all this stuff down so you don't forget when you go. I know I forget half the stuff I want to say during appts, so now I have a special notebook for it all as it comes up.
Josh used to be more like this when he was younger. He's SUPER HYPER and I would hide in my bedroom at times. Meds and maturity have helped. Now if he gets like this I can just tell him and he pretty much stops. I used to say "Think in your head, not with your mouth."
Hang in there...your starting to get some real answers. I don't think it will be too long until you get the whole picture. Much love to you!
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Post by squirrelgirl on Apr 12, 2008 21:45:26 GMT -5
I can totally understand what you're going through. If ds isn't talking (with a constant mega ear piercing high voice), he is making humming noises, or clicking noises, or whistling, or SOMETHING!
I can barely form my own thoughts. I can barely read anything. When I do manage to get a word in, he interrupts me.
It is very annoying. I drew a pie-chart showing him how much of the pie he takes up with talking and how much everyone else's portion covers.
About the only time I get a break is when he is reading, and even then he often gets vocal.
Occasionally I'm lucky and am able to get him quiet, but it only lasts for a moment (i.e. "Let's see if you can stay quiet until we reach the store.")
His medication helps him function in the classroom, although he often blurts out the answers without raising his hand first.
The majority of the time I'm with him, he's not on medication, so I get all the hyperactivity and babbling. Bummer.
Anyway, I just wanted to let you know you're not alone!
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Post by rakuflames on Apr 14, 2008 9:36:01 GMT -5
Raku-He is diagnosed with ADHD and bipolar. He is also diagnosed with possible Aspergers or Reactive Attachment Disorder of Infancy. The psychiatrist and the therapist are not sure which so we do have an appt. this month with a neuropsych who specializes in Autism to see if we can get an answer. He is currently on medication-Abilify and Trileptal. They have helped a lot with other issues but the talking continues and is probably worse than ever. In the past he was taking Depakote and Adderall but they had no effect on him. That's a tougher nut to crack, because ADHD, bipolar and Asperger's can all cause excessive chatter. I don't know about RAD. I think you're very wise to have an expert on autism look at him. For my younger daughter, I viewed her chattering as verbal hyperactivity. It was all over the place. But bipolar can do that too. *In my experience,* kids with Asperger's may talk a lot about the things they have intense interests in. I had a set of parents who just about went over the ridge with this becaues their son's intense interest was ... Poke'mon, something they simply didn't understand and really couldn't develop an interest in. Sigh ... they wanted me to use Poke'mon as a bridge to teaching him. That can work really well with spectrum kids, to teach them through their interests ... but we couldn't figure out any way to capitalize on his interest in Poke'mon. A parent here might think up some way to teach some individual thing with Poke'mon, but if I was going to spend hours and hours studying something I found that ... AWFUL ... I needed to be able to incorporate it in meaningful ways. For instance, I had another student with Asperger's (Caucasion, by the way) who was very interested in the slave trade of the 1700 and 1800's -- and the injustice of it all. Using that we were able to study all sorts of things, including geography and math, and of course, reading. It was also an interest he could share with his class. He got extra respect from his teacher for knowing so much about such a significant event in American and world history. That was another problem with the Poke'mon. His other teachers had no knowledege about it ... and his peers had moved on and saw Poke'mon as "babyish." |
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I was about to conquer the world but then I got distracted by something shiny.
