Post by jj on Jan 7, 2007 0:57:32 GMT -5
Farrah « Thread Started on Dec 28, 2005, 7:19am »
ok, Christmas day about 11am and dd starts to shut down, we were at mil's house opening gifts and she just could contain herself and started to make rude comments, we finally told her to go into the other room to get heself together. she leaves and watches a movie while us adults finish opening gifts. she wont talk to anyone or have her picture taken. she is so overwhelmed and over excited that she shut down. Now i wanted to do the same and was feeling the same, but I have learned to deal with it. It is still very tough mentally but I know it will end, Cheryl just hasn't learned that yet, and I have to just sit and watch this happen. Have any advice or had the same problem.
Linda
Cheryl WILL learn it and I know exactly what you are saying!!! Paul is now 17 and he hates a lot of activity and crowds!!!
He will go off by himself ....usually in his room until he can "deal"
You are a really receptive mom to recognise this in your dd!! You did the right thing!! Good job!!
I have learned to recognise this and respect this in Paul!! Besides I get overwhelmed myself!!
Charlie Girl
I still hate crowds and a lot of activity around me. As a child, I used to take a book with me and and go off to a quiet place to read. As a young adult, I avoided familly reunions because there were so many people.
Maybe if you had her take a book or something she could do on her own, then let her know that when she was bored or tired of being around all the people, she could go off by herself when she felt over stimulated.
farrah
I THOUGHT ABOUT THE BOOK AFTER WE HAD LEFT THE HOUSE, BUT SHE HAD BROUGHT ONE OF HER NEW DVDS ALONG SO SHE LEFT AND WENT TO WATCH IT, WHICH HELPED. THANKS FOR ALL THE SUPPORT. NOW THAT CHRISTMAS OVER WE GET TO DO BIRTHDAYS. SO HERE WE GO AGAIN.
John
Farrah . . . Everybody had some good input . . .I to hate, Err . . .I dislike crowds . . .at party's or any family/group gathering, to feel at ease I become the 'class clown' . . .Many times it's now a role/habit that I just fall into without even planing'thinking about . . . I have to make a consiouse effert to step out of that charecter.
farrah
John.....your right, my dad is like that he hates crowds, so we never went to amusement parks or popular vacation places. which was fine because we always found other out of the way fun places. He would be come the funny guy at parties, but Cheryl has got that ability to step into a character yet and i just feel for her and wish she could learn a coping skill.
Linda
farrah...She WILL learn that coping skill...It sounds like she is learning it now!
farrah
You guys are all so great thanks. we had a good new year, taught the kids to play poker and rummy royale. Its an old game that we played as kids. Cheryl had no problems and Laura loved the poker part. She always bet as much as she could. lol
we have birthdays to do this month and going to try to prepare Cheryl for the party in a different way, to avoid melt down.
I am so greatfull for your support.
John
ONe thing that might work for yer kids is have them focus on one or two people or even help out with One thing at a gathering/'party. Some ADDrs [like me] get overwhelmed . . .your somewhere unfamilar and it's like this vast black hole where you don't know what's going on, who are these ppl, will they like me, who should I be today . . . . . .
I know when my hands are busy helping out, I calm down alot . . .making SMALL TALK is TORTUE for me ! ! !
Charlie Girl
Excellent advice John! Give her something to do so she feels like she is part of it but doesn't have to mingle!
ok, Christmas day about 11am and dd starts to shut down, we were at mil's house opening gifts and she just could contain herself and started to make rude comments, we finally told her to go into the other room to get heself together. she leaves and watches a movie while us adults finish opening gifts. she wont talk to anyone or have her picture taken. she is so overwhelmed and over excited that she shut down. Now i wanted to do the same and was feeling the same, but I have learned to deal with it. It is still very tough mentally but I know it will end, Cheryl just hasn't learned that yet, and I have to just sit and watch this happen. Have any advice or had the same problem.
Linda
Cheryl WILL learn it and I know exactly what you are saying!!! Paul is now 17 and he hates a lot of activity and crowds!!!
He will go off by himself ....usually in his room until he can "deal"
You are a really receptive mom to recognise this in your dd!! You did the right thing!! Good job!!
I have learned to recognise this and respect this in Paul!! Besides I get overwhelmed myself!!
Charlie Girl
I still hate crowds and a lot of activity around me. As a child, I used to take a book with me and and go off to a quiet place to read. As a young adult, I avoided familly reunions because there were so many people.
Maybe if you had her take a book or something she could do on her own, then let her know that when she was bored or tired of being around all the people, she could go off by herself when she felt over stimulated.
farrah
I THOUGHT ABOUT THE BOOK AFTER WE HAD LEFT THE HOUSE, BUT SHE HAD BROUGHT ONE OF HER NEW DVDS ALONG SO SHE LEFT AND WENT TO WATCH IT, WHICH HELPED. THANKS FOR ALL THE SUPPORT. NOW THAT CHRISTMAS OVER WE GET TO DO BIRTHDAYS. SO HERE WE GO AGAIN.
John
Farrah . . . Everybody had some good input . . .I to hate, Err . . .I dislike crowds . . .at party's or any family/group gathering, to feel at ease I become the 'class clown' . . .Many times it's now a role/habit that I just fall into without even planing'thinking about . . . I have to make a consiouse effert to step out of that charecter.
farrah
John.....your right, my dad is like that he hates crowds, so we never went to amusement parks or popular vacation places. which was fine because we always found other out of the way fun places. He would be come the funny guy at parties, but Cheryl has got that ability to step into a character yet and i just feel for her and wish she could learn a coping skill.
Linda
farrah wrote:John.....your right, my dad is like that he hates crowds, so we never went to amusement parks or popular vacation places. which was fine because we always found other out of the way fun places. He would be come the funny guy at parties, but Cheryl has got that ability to step into a character yet and i just feel for her and wish she could learn a coping skill.
farrah...She WILL learn that coping skill...It sounds like she is learning it now!
farrah
You guys are all so great thanks. we had a good new year, taught the kids to play poker and rummy royale. Its an old game that we played as kids. Cheryl had no problems and Laura loved the poker part. She always bet as much as she could. lol
we have birthdays to do this month and going to try to prepare Cheryl for the party in a different way, to avoid melt down.
I am so greatfull for your support.
John
ONe thing that might work for yer kids is have them focus on one or two people or even help out with One thing at a gathering/'party. Some ADDrs [like me] get overwhelmed . . .your somewhere unfamilar and it's like this vast black hole where you don't know what's going on, who are these ppl, will they like me, who should I be today . . . . . .
I know when my hands are busy helping out, I calm down alot . . .making SMALL TALK is TORTUE for me ! ! !
Charlie Girl
Excellent advice John! Give her something to do so she feels like she is part of it but doesn't have to mingle!
