Confused?

[lcdc1]

Do the typical symptoms of bipolar show that when people that have this are in a lack of sleep state that they are manic in a happy sense or manic in a sad, mad, or confused state?

[jj]

The need for sleep is reduced when in the euphoric or "happy" state although sleep disturbances are common when in the depressed state.

Check out Wikipedia...they do a pretty good job of explaining the different states of bipolar.

en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Manic_depression

[lcdc1]

thanks jj that is an interesting reference and some of the sections were insightful. I was talking to a person on a bipolar site under webMD and they confused me with some stats they sent me - what you posted is much clearer and more concerning to me.

I see my regular family doctor next month to refill my concerta prescription and I will ask her some things about it. I found of particular interest the part that was about adolescents and manifestation and some of the references there that parallel my youth and some of the diagnosis I had as a kid early on that say used to be mistaken diagnosis.

I just know that I need to rule this out for me cause I cannot live like this at these times - I kinda feel confused.

I am tired now, but not sleepy tired, I think if I could sleep it might help a little, I did eat some pizza a minute ago and drank no beer tonight so I can see if that works out. 4 or 5 hours sleep would be good, playing the guitar would be good.

[jj]

Your welcome LC. I do hope you get to the bottom of things. I know you are frustrated and probably a little afraid. But in the long run it is better to know what you are dealing with whether it be ruling it out or in. Hugs to ya in that "sisterly" sort of way.

[lcdc1]

You are pretty funny about that sisterly thing, funny how words come back full circle!!

Afraid? That is interesting? Maybe, but I am I supposed to admit it?

[jj]

Nah, you don't have to admit anything. And maybe afraid isn't the right word - how about apprehensive, confused, not liking not knowing whats going on, etc.

Oh, and I couldn't resist saying that "sisterly" thing. Hee hee.

I have also talked to my sister's (a different sister) best friend extensively about how she feels about getting the DX and what all she went through to get to the point she is now. She is bipolar and on medication so even though I don't know first hand I do have a personal interest in bipolar and a little insight.

So if I can help you in any way, just ask.

[lcdc1]

thanks jj that kinda choked me up about the offer to help, I know you are helpful and all the others I deal with all the time and I know it has to be my choice to figure out what is up with me.

I am trying to figure out what the difference is between depression and manic, that does not make sense to me at all? I got this chart thing emailed to me and it has a norm area and above it a elevated mood thing and below like depressed. I seem to be manic according to it when I am lost like this and confused. I don't know the difference?

But, if I am so ticked at myself and do not like me right now is that depressed? If I cannot sleep and am hyped, is that adhd manic?

You know I do not really want to be anything, just me and just do what I do well, but it is not happening right now.

I talked to someone on a bp site and they said that BP is most commonlike at 18 to 25 for onset. I would not fit that category as I started this whole thing as teenager (adhd as a toddler), but the uncontrollable moods and anger started about 11 when I saw my first shrink. So what does that mean? That I am just a nut case?

Maybe I should just stop the ADHD meds and stop fighting myself and my brain and just stop fooling myself?

[jj]

I'm sure it has been suggested to you to keep a daily journal for about 3 months to try to gage how often you are up and down.

In case you don't have a form to do this here is a link. (That may be what you were talking about that was sent to you)

www.lamictal.com/bipolar/resources/pdf/LBP204R0-MoodChart.pdf

But since you can't really decide when you are depressed or manic or if you are either at all.......I'd suggest you get that old Excel program we both love (LOL) and make your own entries. Like "feel confused" or "feel like I can take on the world" or "feel like a train wreck". I would definitely include your eating and sleeping habits. Then once you get enough entries in there that seems to cover how you feel for any given day then rate them as mild to severe. Do this for 3 months and this will help your doctor so much and you may start to see a definite pattern.

Oh and...I'm a nut, your a nut, everyones a nut nut. (Remember that saying or song or what ever it was. Maybe it is before your time)

[lcdc1]

I do not remember that song - I do remember a candy bar one about sometimes you feel like a nut, sometimes you don't!!

I like that spreadsheet you posted better than the other one the other person sent me, I understnad it better. I will keep posting to it and see how it goes?

I hate excel!!! I hate spreadsheet!!! I did not ev en tell you about what happened at work last week with the deadline I screwed up? It involved a six page spreadsheet with 25 categories of personnel percentage of Full time Equivalent employees based on the time they are financed from different jobcodes!!! YUCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKK.

I told myself repeadetyl as I worked throuthg it that I love my job and yup I am a firefighter?

[lcdc1]

I am printing out another month mood chart, think it will work on helping me figure out what is up?