Post by misty on Jun 17, 2008 23:51:30 GMT -5
1) It is well documented that for every mile you jog, you add one
minute to
your life. This enables you, at age 85, to spend five more months in
a
nursing home at $5000 dollars a month.
2) My grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60. She
is now
97 and we don't know where the hell she is!
3) The only reason I would take up jogging is so I could hear heavy
breathing again.
4) I joined a health club last year, spent about $400 dollars, and I
haven't
lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.
5) I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures
out what
I'm doing.
6) I don't exercise at all, If God meant us to touch our toes, he
would have
put them further up on our body.
7) I like long walks, especially when they're taken by people that
annoy me.
8) I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
9) The advantage of exercising everyday is that you die healthier.
10) If you're going to try cross country skiing, start with a real
small
country.
11) And last but not least, I don't jog, because it makes the ice
jump right
out of my glass.
minute to
your life. This enables you, at age 85, to spend five more months in
a
nursing home at $5000 dollars a month.
2) My grandmother started walking 5 miles a day when she was 60. She
is now
97 and we don't know where the hell she is!
3) The only reason I would take up jogging is so I could hear heavy
breathing again.
4) I joined a health club last year, spent about $400 dollars, and I
haven't
lost a pound. Apparently you have to show up.
5) I have to exercise early in the morning before my brain figures
out what
I'm doing.
6) I don't exercise at all, If God meant us to touch our toes, he
would have
put them further up on our body.
7) I like long walks, especially when they're taken by people that
annoy me.
8) I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.
9) The advantage of exercising everyday is that you die healthier.
10) If you're going to try cross country skiing, start with a real
small
country.
11) And last but not least, I don't jog, because it makes the ice
jump right
out of my glass.
