Disappointed...

[bugsmom]

Well, we've made it through the withdrawl of the Strattera and he's been med free (except for the Tenex) for 2 days now. I hate that I'm even going to type these words, but I'm so disappointed. I don't know if I was wishing for a miracle, but he is so hyper. I mean I know he needs medication, but I guess after not seeing him so long without meds I was hoping his hyperactivity would be a little better. It's not. I'm so sad. He is ALL over the place. He can't sit still, focus, read, or even hold a conversation without jumping to another subject.

He, on the other hand, is happier than ever. He is his pure self. But, his pure self can't stop. Right now he's in his room playing his electric gituar, amp as loud as he can get it, singing to the radio. He's happy. I've had to take several breaks away from him today and you know what he says to me..."Mom, it's ok, its just my disability." Arrrrgggggg...breaks my heart.

I don't know what I was thinking. I guess I thought with age and maturity he could handle things a little better with the hyperness. I was wrong. We were hoping to keep him off meds at least until after the holidays and re-evalutate. Now, I don't know if I'll make it. I don't know how he's going to get his schoolwork done. I feel bad for feeling so disappointed. He is who he is....

Thanks for listening...i just needed to vent.

[misty]

I'm sorry. I understand your disappointment. It is hard, I know. Maybe he will find his own way to cope. Maybe getting him out in the cold air to run around for an hour each day will help. Have you tried fish oil? Maybe that will help a bit. Shannon isn't the hyper type, but she does go through a wound up period each evening it seems. I try & do something active with her, or let her take the dog for a walk or something & it seems to help.

[jj]

Bugs, I'm sorry your so sad. I can understand why you were wishing some of his hyper would go away. I don't think you'll ever stop wishing for miracles regarding your son. Hugs to you.

Now I hate to say this but I just don't think medication should take away that happy child. I don't think those meds can be the right fit for him if he isn't the happy child you see now without the meds. They shouldn't take away the things you love about him and most importantly the happy child. I don't know but maybe mention this to his doc.

[katiekat]

I am sorry that you did not see the results you were hoping for Bugs. I wouldn't give up hope yet. My best friends son, who has ADHD was hyper with a capital H. Once he got into high school the hyperactivity decreased dramatically. Sure, he still has some problems with organization and focus at school but you would never, ever know from looking at him now what a hyper little kid he was.

[bugsmom]

Oh, I'll never give up hope, KK. ;D I'm just having one of those day.

I was actually thinking awhile ago that I need to take a deep breath and chill. I had forgotten that when I've taken Josh off meds before, he was always extra hyper for 3 or 4 days after the last dose. So, I'm going to ride it out a little longer before I completely fall apart.

JJ...I totally get what your saying about a kid being happy. I guess I chose the wrong words. Josh is a pretty happy kid, either on or off meds. I guess the difference is that when he's on them (and we've tried them all) he's a little more "on edge". All of the meds have done this. When he's off, he's very carefree and oblivious to his behavior, so it seems like he's much happier. The bad side to that is that I'm constantly reminding him to lower his voice, sit still, stay focased, ect.... The hyperactivity is VERY hard to deal with. I forgot how LOUD he could be....yikes! My husband says its like watching Jim Carrey on crack!

Misty...I always try to put some kind of physical activity in our day. If I didn't (even on meds) he'd be bouncing off the walls. It really helps him to get his heart pumping. I swear his body craves physical activity. He gets a little clearer afterwards.

Thanks for all your help everyone...I know you understand.

[puzzled]

Jim Carrey on crack!! Wow. I feel for you!

I am sorry to report that our little experiment with chase did not work out either. I thought he was doing okay schoolwise, I had no bad reports from any of the teachers, but after the full week on the lower dose, I started to notice him complaining about things more...like the way a classmate spoke....or some other little thing....I mean it was like this little thing was bothering him immensly. He got all worked up. It got worse by the end of the week, and finally on Thursday, he had math homework. He asked me for help, but when I gave it, he got all defensive and 'didn't need any help' anymore, went into the dining room and was working....till I heard sniffling. I went out and he had a pile of used tissues, his eyes were red from crying, and he was running his hands through his hair in frustration as he used to do pre medication days...turns out, the day he missed school, he missed the lecture eplaining some terms, and he was stressing over not being able to label some problems....I told him to put his homework away, he has a 98% in math and I would email the teacher and explain his distress, and she would explain the terms the next day.

Turns out, in response to my email, she told me that he had not been doing his homework all week, he had been using free homework passes earned earlier in the year, and that she had noticed inattention the day before during class...but not till the end of the class did she know that he had hidden some other paper under his math book....so he was attentive enough to hide it from her...she was planning to inform me in her weekly email.

On Friday, I gave him his full dose, and that evening, he said out of the blue..."Today was a good day." I took the opportunity to have a talk with him telling him that even though it is not fun to have to take all the meds he takes, our little experiment proved to us that he needs them. I told him that we can try again in a year or two....

[lcdc1]

I am sorry you are sad, but do not be! It is all OK, wait a little longer and see what is up. As a major hyper adult, I accept that it is OK for me to be on meds and just a part of life. I cannot ever believe I made it in one piece unmedicated years ago. I was happy off meds, but man was I in the middle of every situation that eventually turned out to be trouble! I have learned to be happy and successful on meds.

Your boy is a smart kid, he should have some say in what it is like without meds, I think he might know when it is an issue too!

I totally respect you and your decision to periodically take him off meds to see what is up, if he doesn't need them, then stop, if he does, just make sure they are the right ones and right combo. When I was just taking concerta, I was not real happy, adding two more meds over time has proven to be the correct mix for now! Hang in there and never get discouraged, your a GREAT MOM and he is an AWESOME KID!

[jj]

Thanks Bugs for clearing that up. I understand now what you were saying.

[charliegirl]

Nov 18, 2008 17:07:46 GMT -5 bugsmom said:

I was actually thinking awhile ago that I need to take a deep breath and chill. I had forgotten that when I've taken Josh off meds before, he was always extra hyper for 3 or 4 days after the last dose. So, I'm going to ride it out a little longer before I completely fall apart.

While I was reading your post about him being so hyperactive I was wondering whether he just needed more time to adjust. Since you are homeschooling him you have the luxury of giving him that time, which is great. Now, here's hoping everyone else in the family doesn't go crazy during that time....

[jfla]

hey bugsmom, don't lose heart!

My son (at almost 20) said that he was experiencing rebound for two weeks last summer when he took a med break. I thought it was his normal unmedicated self! After the two weeks, he really did so much better surprising me that he had been going without medication. He was able to take a good look at how he functions without the stress of school.
I won't deny that he drove some of us nuts on a road trip. It takes a lot of patience to not let yourself get caught in some of the craziness.

A couple possibilities are that he might need more time to adjust, as charlie said and my son experienced; or that it might be that physically his body has not changed (in a chem/neuro need for med balancing).

Hang in there!