Post by jj on Jan 7, 2007 1:10:59 GMT -5
Charliegirl « Thread Started on Jan 9, 2006, 4:40pm »
My husband and I decided to have our son tested by a really good psych we know, to have a definite diagnosis done, then try putting our son on meds.
Our son knows we have been resistant to medicating him and have done everything we could to help him but that it isn't enough at this point.
I mentioned to him that we were probably going to try meds and that I had talked to a mother who said her son went from failing everything to being a straight honor student as soon as he was medicated. I thought that would excite him.
The problem is that my son has heard his father blast meds verbally for too long. He informed me he would not take them, that they destroyed your body. I tried to explain that when you needed meds, they were better for you than not taking them would be.
He is afraid to take them. Has anyone dealt with this with their child? How did you handle it? Any suggestions are appreciated.
I have a while as I haven't even gotten the appointment to have him tested yet, but I think it would be best to get him used to the idea. I just don't know the best way to try to change his attitude.
misty
Wow, Barb, we go thru the same stuff here! #33omg3# My hubby is not afraid to speak his mind (over & over again) in fron of Shannon, even though he knows full well she takes to heart everything he says!
When Shannon resisted trying meds (and then later, trying supplements) NOTHING I said could break down the wall my hubby had built by saying time & again that ADHD was NOT her problem (he said she just needed to pay attention & not fool around so much...DUH)!
After FINALLY getting HIM to accept ADHD I had to figure out how to get HER to take a pill without having to chase her through the house & force it on her!
Finally, I struck upon a compromise. I talked to her & got her to agree to just TRY it for a determined amount of time. I told her we'd keep notes & decide TOGETHER how well the meds worked, how they made her feel, how they helped her in school, etc. Feeling that she had a part in the process & making it into an "experiment" in part, got her to agree. Your son is old enough that maybe he would go along with a "trial" too, if you present it too him so that he feels he''s part of the process.
jj
I read this post a few minutes ago and with no kids in the house for so many years I drew a blank. But I love Misty's idea!!!
Another thing that may really help is if hubby sits down with your son and admits he was wrong and maybe does a bit of convincing talking as to why he was wrong. This will have an added bonus of seeing it is O.K. to admit you were wrong.
Oh, and I be praying you find the right med straight-away for your little guy.
Charlie Girl
I will definitely try that Misty. It can't hurt and he does like to feel that he has control of any situation.
Thanks jj. My hubby is already trying to back track but he hates to admit he is wrong, so we will have to wait and see how well Daddy eating humble pie will work. Hopefully, it will be enough of a novelty to make an impression.
Linda
misty's idea is a good one but I think your son will see for himself when he starts taking meds! He will start to feel better about himself and his self esteem will soar!
Paul was always so impulsive when he was your sons age and THE MEDS HELPED HIM PUT "tHE BRAKES ON"
I agree though your husband needs to come around and all of you need to be united
Charlie Girl
I brought the subject of meds up again last night. When my son started yelling "I'm not taking any meds!" I suggested a compromise.
I asked about him taking them for a month and then we could compare notes and he could decide whether they worked enough for him to want to continue them. He piped up with "Not a month, a week!"
I really don't think a week will be enough time unless we hit the right med and the right dose immediately, but oh well, its a step in the right direction and I still have time to work on it more.
Linda
It is a step in the right direction!! We got really lucky and got the right dose and med the first time!! I hope the same for you!!
I always have to compromise too....you should have told your son 2 months...then he might have dropped it to a month! Good Luck
My husband and I decided to have our son tested by a really good psych we know, to have a definite diagnosis done, then try putting our son on meds.
Our son knows we have been resistant to medicating him and have done everything we could to help him but that it isn't enough at this point.
I mentioned to him that we were probably going to try meds and that I had talked to a mother who said her son went from failing everything to being a straight honor student as soon as he was medicated. I thought that would excite him.
The problem is that my son has heard his father blast meds verbally for too long. He informed me he would not take them, that they destroyed your body. I tried to explain that when you needed meds, they were better for you than not taking them would be.
He is afraid to take them. Has anyone dealt with this with their child? How did you handle it? Any suggestions are appreciated.
I have a while as I haven't even gotten the appointment to have him tested yet, but I think it would be best to get him used to the idea. I just don't know the best way to try to change his attitude.
misty
Wow, Barb, we go thru the same stuff here! #33omg3# My hubby is not afraid to speak his mind (over & over again) in fron of Shannon, even though he knows full well she takes to heart everything he says!
When Shannon resisted trying meds (and then later, trying supplements) NOTHING I said could break down the wall my hubby had built by saying time & again that ADHD was NOT her problem (he said she just needed to pay attention & not fool around so much...DUH)!
After FINALLY getting HIM to accept ADHD I had to figure out how to get HER to take a pill without having to chase her through the house & force it on her!
Finally, I struck upon a compromise. I talked to her & got her to agree to just TRY it for a determined amount of time. I told her we'd keep notes & decide TOGETHER how well the meds worked, how they made her feel, how they helped her in school, etc. Feeling that she had a part in the process & making it into an "experiment" in part, got her to agree. Your son is old enough that maybe he would go along with a "trial" too, if you present it too him so that he feels he''s part of the process.
jj
I read this post a few minutes ago and with no kids in the house for so many years I drew a blank. But I love Misty's idea!!!
Another thing that may really help is if hubby sits down with your son and admits he was wrong and maybe does a bit of convincing talking as to why he was wrong. This will have an added bonus of seeing it is O.K. to admit you were wrong.
Oh, and I be praying you find the right med straight-away for your little guy.
Charlie Girl
I will definitely try that Misty. It can't hurt and he does like to feel that he has control of any situation.
Thanks jj. My hubby is already trying to back track but he hates to admit he is wrong, so we will have to wait and see how well Daddy eating humble pie will work. Hopefully, it will be enough of a novelty to make an impression.
Linda
misty's idea is a good one but I think your son will see for himself when he starts taking meds! He will start to feel better about himself and his self esteem will soar!
Paul was always so impulsive when he was your sons age and THE MEDS HELPED HIM PUT "tHE BRAKES ON"
I agree though your husband needs to come around and all of you need to be united
Charlie Girl
I brought the subject of meds up again last night. When my son started yelling "I'm not taking any meds!" I suggested a compromise.
I asked about him taking them for a month and then we could compare notes and he could decide whether they worked enough for him to want to continue them. He piped up with "Not a month, a week!"
I really don't think a week will be enough time unless we hit the right med and the right dose immediately, but oh well, its a step in the right direction and I still have time to work on it more.
Linda
It is a step in the right direction!! We got really lucky and got the right dose and med the first time!! I hope the same for you!!
I always have to compromise too....you should have told your son 2 months...then he might have dropped it to a month! Good Luck
