Not hungry at lunch

[margie]

Hello I am new to this board and while I have read many posts I have not posted until now.

I am having issues with my son's summer camp and how they are handling his lunch. I never force my son to eat if he says he is not hungry. The camp does and will not let him go off to play until he eats what ever amount they decide.

He has been pretty good about it but it bugs me that he is being forced to eat when his body tells him he is not hungry. My main fear is he will lose the ability to know when he is full and will have issues down the road.


I have disused this with the camp staff and it just seems to do little good. They feel he needs to eat. I started packing his lunch and snacks separate and told him he needs to eat at least what I have packed for lunch and then if hungry can eat from the snack bag. I then packed a cheese stick and a crush cup yogurt for his lunch. When I picked him up the staff let me know what he ate for lunch and it was everything he had packed for lunch and the snacks. He ended up eating lunch plus a pack of crunchy granola bars, fruit cup, small container of chips, milk, and a juice. I asked my son why he ate it all at lunch and he said they made him.

Has anyone had to deal with this and how did you handle it? Am I in the wrong and should I also be making him eat at lunch time?

[charliegirl]

Welcome Margie!

I don't have experience with this so I'm just going to give you my opinion. Since I don't know the particulars, feel free to ignore this if you think I'm off base.

Do you feel he is getting proper nutrition without forcing him to eat? Is he on meds that make him not feel hungry?

It is important that kids eat properly but if he is eating at night after meds wear off, then I would tell them he is only to eat what you send with him unless he asks for more.

If he never has an appetite then it won't hurt him to have to eat something at lunch. I don't think you need to worry about him forgetting how to know when he is full unless they are stuffing him.

Is there any way you can be there at lunch a few times to see what is going on? You will be in a better position to discuss how much is enough once you see whether they are really forcing him to eat too much.

[misty]

First of all, welcome to the board! We are glad to have you here & I'm so glad you feel comfortable posting.

I have not have this particular issue, but I have had other issues where school or camp staff failed to listen to my wishes. What I have done is get a letter from my daughter's pediatrician. They tend to follow your wishes better if you have a statement from someone "official". It really stinks that they do not follow the parent's wishes though...you know your child better than anyone.

I'm sure someone else will be of help ...we have several parents who have been down this sort of road.

[bugsmom]

Welcome to the board Margie.....We're so happy your here.


I'm so sorry your going thru this type of situation...it must be so frustrating for you. You have a right to be upset. I know I'd be through the roof if my kid was forced to eat when he wasn't hungry.

With that being said, is there a reason he isn't feeling hungry? I know when my son is on ADHD medication he dosen't want to eat anything during the day. My son takes Focalin and his appetite is gone all day. He usually eats a really big breakfast, and then won't eat again until around 5 pm. If he's on meds its really hard to get much in them. What I don't understand is why they are making such an issue about it.

I really like Misty's idea about getting a letter. Maybe that would help you.

How does your son feel about all this?

[margie]

To answer the question most asked, my son is on medication that causes him to not feel hungry.

I talked again with the head of the camp and her and I worked out a compromise. I do not mind them making him eat a little something as he needs some food in him even if he doesn't feel hungry. He seems to have a better disposition and more energy when he eats something. I agreed with this part but said I do not want him being forced to eat large amounts because someone has decided he doesn't eat enough. He also seems to eat less at night and get full sooner when he eats a small lunch.

I now will pack a small lunch and the snacks will be separate and stay in his camp bag until snack time. We both hope this will cut down on the over feeding. I just need to make sure he has a grain, protein, and fruit/veggie at lunch. I will wait and see how this goes.

[misty]

Please let us know how it goes. Sounds like maybe they are finally willing to make some compromises & thats good if they follow through.

[jj]

I don't really have anything to add, especially since it sounds like you finally got throught to the camp staff, but just wanted to welcome you to the site.

[jill]

welcome to the board. My daughter is in summer camp and no issues she eats what she wants. I pack my child extra snacks for when they do snack time and she does not like what they have she will starve.

[squirrelgirl]

Hi,

I can certainly understand this dilemma. My son barely eats a nibble during school lunch. The medication totally zaps his appetite. Each year, when he gets a new teacher, I explain the medication side effects.

Various parents who visit the lunchroom often make remarks to the teacher about his consistent lack of eating and that the teacher should do more to encourage him to eat. These parents just don't understand the situation and I don't really feel like explaining to them. Of course, the teacher isn't going to explain it because of confidentiality.

Some of the classmates make comments to my son about his lack of eating. It can be difficult for him to deal with because it draws attention that he would rather not have. He doesn't say much of anything about it (he's super shy anyway).

I wish there was a medication that didn't have such a problematic side effect for my son. We're trying Intuniv now (a non-stimulant), but not sure it's going to be the right med for him, although he has a great appetite with it.

Squirrel