new member

[amy1129]

Hi all,

I am here introducing myself and my child.

here is a hopefully quick backstory.

My 7.5 y/o son has been a "problem" child since he could speak. Started off by saying no to everything, throwing tantrums, hitting, spitting, being defiant, pushing the envelope etc. DH and I thought it was "2nd child" syndrome, our 1st was a "perfect" girl. We felt as though we werent as strict with him so maybe he was just seeing what he could get away with. then we thought, ok this must be " a boy" thing. Every year at his check up, the pedi would ask about behavior, I would say eh he's a boy, always getting into trouble, not listening to us, rude, hits, talks back, talks about hating us, etc. at age 3 she said, you might want to take him to see someone, I was like, omg he;s 3. then at 4, same thing, then at 5 I kinda went ok, he is now talking about wanting to die, he hates himself, hates us, doesnt like not getting his way, but still thought it was us doing something wrong. by 5.5 y/o i started calling ins co getting referalls and advice, not too many people see 5 year olds for this....geesh. got him a neuro psych, told us he was severely depressed, adhd combined type and anxiety disorder.
went thru 3 different therapists , now we see a therapist and pyshologist and on meds but havent fould the right ones yet.

i am here looking for advice, support, help and just moms/dads to vent to and hopefully I can do the same in return!!

[aimee8305]

First of all welcome! This is definitely a safe place to get advice and vent.

My son is 6 and I have been through all of what you just described.

What meds is he taking?

[amy1129]

He started on Vyvanse 20 mg right before christmas for 2 weeks, it was working awesome for the day, his teacher notice a huge difference in his work and focus, he was almost hyper focused but on the right things. he also seemed less smily and sunken shoulders at time. But at night he would almost explode as the meds wore off, he would become so angry and unable to caml him. Worse than before going on the meds. If we was sad, he was really sad, or really angry, like he was all bottled up and just exploded when he got home. the dr suggested to 30 mg for another 2 weeks to see if the meds would stay in the system longer but nope. so last week he added 5 mg of dextroamphetamine (sp?) to be given at 4ish. adding this has made him even more angry and more touchy, I cant figure it out so we have cut it back (on our own) to 2.5 mg without any change.

If this keeps up, I may call in to the office for a sooner apt than our scheduled end of Feb apt, I think he may need to change from vyvanse.

what is your son on?

[katiekat]

Hi Amy, welcome! Your story sounds pretty similar to mine. My son is now 11 but his past sounds a lot like your sons. He is actually my stepson so I was not around for his first 4 years but from what my husband has told me his issues started before he was 2. Very defiant, hitting, tantrums, and did not listen to anyone. My husband was a single father and had to work so Sean was in daycare. By the time I met him he had been kicked out of 6. In kindergarten he started talking about suicide. I also experienced difficulty finding a doctor who would see a child so young. We finally got him in an Intensive Outpatient Program and they prescribed him medication. I cannot remember what the 1st meds were but I do know they did not help. After he completed that program I finally found a psychiatrist who would see him. She added Atarax because he did not sleep. He started seeing a therapist who told me he had Aspergers. I never agreed with this dx and took him to a nueropsych who said no way to the Aspergers. After a few months he was given a diagnosis of Bipolar, ADHD, and anxiety. After several different meds we finally found something that worked and he is still taking them (Abilify). With a combination of the meds, therapy, counseling at school and a whole lot of structure and routine at home things have improved. There is no problem with the physical aggression anymore and his defiance has lessened. He is still very needy and attention seeking (positive or negative) and has a long way to go but there is definitely improvement since he was 5. I know I am forgetting a lot but I just wanted to let you know I understand what you are going through. Feel free to ask any questions! Everyone here really helped me when I was going through an absolute nightmare. Things will get better!

[jj]

Hi Amy,
I just wanted to say hi and welcome to our group.

My story: I came to this site as a concerned Auntie (my sisters daughter -ADHD(dx'd) and likely bipolar (no dx) and I also had custody of my grand niece (ADD- dx'd) for a time but both are grown up. They both are doing o.k with my grand niece married and kids of her own. My niece just recently moved out of her parents home and is working full time. My sister went through much of what you are going through and there were times my sister thought about just running away from it all it and was seriously considering Boy's (and girls)Town for her daughter, it was that bad.

I hope that will give you a little encouragement that you will get through this very rough time and we are here to listen and help when we can.

[aimee8305]

Last Feb. I started my son on Tenex and we slowly increased the dosage. That helped a little with the impulsivity but not a whole lot. Recently (about 2 months ago) I swtiched psych dr's and she put him on a stimulant (Dexedrine or dextroamphetimiine) in the morning and the Tenex at night. It is working awesome! We are still slowly increasing the dosage of the Dexedrine. The meds plus I have monthly meetings with my sons teacher, counselor, OT, and school shrink. And we see his psych dr (meds dr) once a month too.

My sons anger is a lot better these days, well when medicated. When they wear off it can get a lil intense but its usually about the time to give him the nightly med. I have learned that meds are by trial and error but once you find the right ones....My son is a lot less anxious these days because he can focus and that definitely helps with the depression.

We are still a work in progress. Good Luck!

[misty]

Welcome Amy! My daughter is 17 & non hyper type ADD. We did try meds when she was young, but her personality absolutely changed for the worse, so I can certainly relate to what you are seeing in your son. She was depressed & angry, which was so totally unlike her. Because she never was hyper or aggressive we just took her off all meds & just used Omega 3 (fish oil) to help with her focus. I'm not suggesting you do that as your child sounds to be on the hyper side. I do know it usually takes at least a few med changed before you find the med or combination of meds that works for each particular child. It can help to keep a diary of sorts so Drs can see exactly what you (and your son) are dealing with each day. Its easy to forget or overlook something when you are in the office & trying to remember & describe what has gone on since your last visit.

You'll certainly get a lot of support here.....I'm so glad you found us!

[charliegirl]

Welcome Amy! I don't have anything beyond what the others have said. You can count on them to give good advice since they have been through much the same thing.