Effective Interventions?

[notellin]

My son has made some great gains in the past few months, so I thought I'd share what I think is working. Some of this may seem silly, I suppose, but here goes.

He's improved with self-control, socially, and with aggression.

* 1000 mg of High-EPA fish oil daily and an anti-oxident with minerals
* 2 mg of melatonin at bedtime. Less than 9 hrs sleep=disaster.
* I give him more time. More time in the morning. More time afterschool before starting homework. I give him breaks between homework sheets.
* I stopped giving him lunches that I wanted him to eat (which came home uneaten). Now I just give him what he wants to eats that's reasonable. My goal reduced to intake of any protein at every meal.
* Lavish praise, endearing comments, and more lavish praise.
* For aggression I eliminated all media that included violence, and all toys that encourage violent play. He needs to get through the entire school year without hitting to earn them back otherwise, he can try again the next school year. It's a one-shot deal.
* The timeout method described in the 1-2-3 magic book seems to be helping him practice self-control.
* I tell him in great detail about social interactions. I tell him to practice looking at people's faces and think about how they are feeling. I tell him exactly what behavior people are finding annoying. I tell him to do things the other kid's way first. I will take a specific behavior and discuss it (when you make faces at your classmate, does she smile at you? Does she make a face back? Do you think that you are annoying her? Do you think you should stop making faces at her since she does not like it?)
* I have him walk to school with another boy so he has someone to play with right when he gets there
* I tell him when a particular adult would like to have more eye contact from him. I tell him when a particular adult keeps telling me that he's smirking, and she does not like it, so he should stop. We discuss complaints that I get from adults in detail -- not like they are bad -- but exactly what he can do so that THEY will stop talking about it. Usually, he is totally unaware. Like the smirking. He had no idea that this person had a big problem with it, and was going on and on about it.
* homeopathic remedy -- got rid of the silliness only.
* IEP -- behavior plan tied in with rewards at home. We use marbles and he picks the rewards.

He also gets OT and a social skills class, but they just started. He also sees a child therapist and I don't think that is doing a thing. I know that therapy is recommended for children with ADHD, but I don't really get that.

The school still complains relentlessly, of course. They no longer complain about aggression and social problems with peers. They just moved on to the next set of complaints, without recognizing the progress.

[unicorn]

Fantastic notellin! I am so glad that he is diong so well and you have found so many things that are helping.

Take it one day at a time with the schools.

You are doing a great job!

[misty]

Notellin. My daughter was in therapy for over a year & I'm with you---I don't think it did a thing!

You stated :

* homeopathic remedy -- got rid of the silliness only.

I was wondering what the homeopathic remedy was & if you continued it. do you think the silliness is something you need to control?

I ask because one of the main reasons we stopped medicating Shannon in the beginning (Besides THE main reason of the horrible side effects) was that her silliness left. She no longer seemed herself, nothing seemed to excite her, she seemed to lose her sense of fun, of adventure, of humor. I LIKE the silliness! I MISSED it!

[charliegirl]

Do you have things in his IEP to help with his educational related issues? I'd like to know what they are and how much you feel they have helped him so far.

Thank you. Thats really interesting about the no hitting for the entire year. It amazes me that he is showing that much self control. Good job! I hope he makes it.

[marcelmom]

Notelling:

You wrote a really interesting piece of information. I wonder how old is your child. Mine is going to be seven next Sunday and I still struggle with him when it comes to serious talks about behavior; he just doesn't seem to understand. His major problem is opposition at home and he is also starting to have fights with another boy in the school bus; yesterday when I picked him I was told he was hitting, he had stopped doing such a thing. I spoke to him but I don't think he really listened.
Gladly, I will get today my 123magic book; let's see if I find something really helpful there.
My son attends social skills class, which I think has been of great help. My son used to be teased a lot last year, and this year the teacher told me that he has overcome this situation; he is playing better and having better social interactions; eventhough, he sticks to one or two friends for playtime.
He also has a therapist that helps him with his adhd, and I am still kind of desperate in dealing with homework and focusing. I usually tell her that I am concerned and desperate with his focusing, she always says that this is a veeeeery sloooow proooocesss!!!!. I don't know what to think or say. It is probably me that want to see fast results and this is not possible: My son started treatment 7 months ago and has been working with the therapist for about five months.
Good to hear about your son progress, moreover that he is not medicated. Schools?? Very difficult that they acknowledge progress. In my case, school faculty has shown to be supportive in some ways but not in others. Last time I spoke to the school psychologist she told me that it was better to find another placement for my ds next year due to the hard demands for next year. My ds got a very good report card last time it was given; he showed great improvement compared to last year. They know I am a concerned parent and doing all I can and all I can't really afford to help my son. Yes, my son still has focusing problems, but he has showed improvement and I am sure that he will be better with time. He is in his last level of preschool!!!
Ok, I think I started a topic and then I decided to vent a little

Thanks for the advice!!

[notellin]

misty -- it was such a relief to get rid of the silly behavior. I am referring to the downright goofy obnoxious annoying behavior. I ran out of the remedy once and this behavior returned, so I know it's the remedy. He still gets excited, he is fun-loving, has a good sense of humor--all the good stuff is still there. The remedy is phosphorous, and I use a well-known homeopath. But this remedy has run it's course and we are switching to another one (when it arrives, I'll know the name) to address the focus issues.

charliegirl -- his IEP has 45 min in the resource room daily for 1-1 help. He has OT through the school to learn self-regulation skills. He has a behavior plan. A behavior specialist made some fabulous recommendations. The resource room is helping -- there are less distractions there. The thing is, if you can get him to focus he learns new info pretty rapidly. As for the behavior plan, that's a process that we've just begun. I think it will eventually help. The OT that will begin soon, and was recommended by the neuro-psyche so I have hope for that as well.

marcelmom--My son is 7.5. What grade is your son in? Does he have an IEP? We were able to have serious talks about behavior after my son turned 7. Probably in the last 4 months this has really worked. Theraputic doses of Omega-3 really help with opposition, IMHO. For hitting when he was younger, I used to draw a picture of a School Highway, with kids walking down it. I drew a little dirt road off to the side with one kid walking to a shack, with dust everywhere. I said, that's you -- everyone else is on the School Highway, but when you hit, you got lost on this dirt road by yourself and no one wants to join you. You are heading for a deadend. They want to stay on the School Highway. What road do you want to be on? What road will you choose tomorrow?

[charliegirl]

notellin said:

For hitting when he was younger, I used to draw a picture of a School Highway, with kids walking down it. I drew a little dirt road off to the side with one kid walking to a shack, with dust everywhere. I said, that's you -- everyone else is on the School Highway, but when you hit, you got lost on this dirt road by yourself and no one wants to join you. You are heading for a deadend. They want to stay on the School Highway. What road do you want to be on? What road will you choose tomorrow?

I like that. You showed him a visual picture of what happens when he hits. Really good idea. I'll have to remember that.

[marcelmom]

My son is in third and last level of preschool. Where I live grades are not in the same order as in the US. The level he is in would be first grade in the US. Unfortunately, we don't have IEP here.

I love the idea about the picture. I might try that to see how he responds. Thank you!!

[katiekat]

Notellin, When you talk about social skills class is that something that he gets at school? I've never heard of it before. What kind of things do they do? This is something I think would benefit Sean but I dont think there is such a thing in my school district.

[lostmyshoe]

Notellin,

I'm so glad things are going well for you. Thank you so much for all the information in your post. I'm so glad you wrote it. I've thought about having my daughter try the fish oil but I got scared off when my Sister-N-Law told me that her son was burping up a fish taste after taking it. That would never go with my daughter. She is the most finicky eater ever and has the most sensitive palad. I'm wondering if there is a fish oil she can take that has no after taste and the same with the anti-oxident. I have such a hard time just getting her to take vitamins.

Becca had that silliness that was also mentioned in this thread until school and her peers took care of that. She's serious a lot more these days but every now and then a little silliness will pop out and I don't mind. Being a pre-teen/teen can be tough. It's so good to hear your son is doing well. Sounds like you are doing a great job! I'm hoping my daughter's 3rd quarter is better then the last one. Wishing you the best always. Dee