Sometimes They Do Listen

[katiekat]

I was so impressed by the way Sean handled his frustration today. I heard him up in his room yelling,stomping and eventually crying but instead of completely losing control he pulled himself together,came downstairs and handed me his Spongebob video game and said I think you better take this away from me because it's upsetting me. He asked that I keep it for 2 weeks and then maybe he would be able to handle it better. I held in the laughter and told him that was a very mature thing to do and how proud I was of him for making such a good desicion. It was good to see that he is recognizing when he's going to "lose it" and also that he must really listen to what I say to him.

[bugsmom]

Katie...that is just wonderful news! It sounds like Sean is really trying hard to compose himself and what he did tonight is incredible! Please tell me what you did! I had to take Josh's new Zelda game away this weekend because he was melting down over it! Darn video games will get them everytime!

Tell Sean I said "Great job"!

[puzzled]

Awwww, such self control!! Yep it is rewarding when they say or do something that you have been saying/doing for a long time.

Good for him!

[misty]

Thats WONDERFUL, KK! I think its awesome that he was able to see that the game was going to get him in trouble & control his anger enough to bring it to you! What a super kid!

[puzzled]

Exactly! I will hear the boys up there yelling at the game and getting upset, and I will say, "Is it time to turn it off?" They will say "Mom we are having fun!" To which I answer, "Sure sounds like fun...." Sometimes I just flat out tell them to turn it off, it is frustrating them so much!

[charliegirl]

I love that he punished himself by taking away the game. That cracks me up. He beat mom to the punch!

Its great that he is recognizing when he is getting out of control and not only kept it away from the rest of the family but wasn't destructive.

How long are you going to keep the game from him? I would be so tempted to tell him since he handled it so maturely, that he could decide when he felt able to try again.

[katiekat]

When he starts getting frustrated with the games to the point where he is losing control I take it away from him but do it in a way which ends up with him laughing. I tell him the game is very very mean and I do not like the game upsetting him-I tell him that unless the game can be nice then the game will be punished because I do not appreciate the game upsetting my little boy. The game then gets one more chance to play nice and by this point the tension between Sean and the game has been broken.
Probably would not work with an older child but he thinks it's funny.

[crazyhouse]

When Jake was still in the womb I told my husband he was not aloud to introduce video games until he was 10 yrs old (as you can see I lost that battle) Anyways

When Jake has anger issues with his game I tell him Jake it's just a game and if you can't play nicely then it will be turned off. If he does get upset again I say to him OK Jake it's not good to get all mad it just takes practice to beat the levels and you are done for now let's turn it off. He usually trys to muffle the untapped anguish to play longer. I think I'm trying to instill patience not violence hopefully

[katiekat]

This is the thing about Sean-he can take anything and turn it from something good into something that will drive you insane.
Like the video game thing. He did it once and it was great and I praised him but since then he has taken it to a whole new level. Since then he has "given" me the game 50 times or more. I told him next time he gave it to me I was keeping it for a week. So he did it again and I said Im keeping it now and so then he starts giving me OTHER video games. Ones that dont even frustrate him. So now Ive had to tell him any games he gives me Im keeping for a month. He does this with everything, like if you mention something once or do something once it becomes all consuming. His need for attention is insatiable, some days it just drains every bit of life out of me.

[lostmyshoe]

Hey Katie,

I know what you mean about being drained. It's my daughter's in-attention to things that drives me insane. I do think it's a good thing that Sean is trying to help himself when he knows he is losing control. I wish I could say that about Becca today. She humiliated me and herself today at her school. I just want to cry right now. What an ending to the day. I'm going to write a seperate post on it. Hope you had a good day with Sean today.