mellissa
New Member
Very blessed mother[ss:Lilac dreams]
Posts: 12
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Post by mellissa on Oct 9, 2008 5:39:49 GMT -5
It seems that in the state of Tennessee a child at the age of 15 can choose not to take their meds o their own. Here is problem#1 We have tried taking him off his meds and he simply just cannot function without it. Problem #2 He is trying really hard but we seem to be getting nowhere in school. He cries and says "Mom I am trying I just can't do it." The teachers here are not sympathetic to him at all. He is failing math and as they have no math books to bring home how can I help him without a reference guide. I have tried to schedule conferences with his teacher's she simply just start quoting grades on the phone. We have been dealing with this since James was 5 and I am at my wits end with the public school system but cannot afford to homeschool him heere. He can verbally tell you anything you want to know and state tests say he is proficient to advanced in almost all areas but he simply cannot put it on paper. When he does you cannot read it as there are no spaces between words and the letters are all jumbled together. We have tried working on that issue to no avail. Any help would be greatly appreciated. We are also haveing several social issues. Too many to list here. lol Pray for my son He is a specil young man and I love him very much but now I am not sure how to help him
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Post by charliegirl on Oct 9, 2008 6:33:24 GMT -5
Does he have an IEP? If he does, you can have input as to what is on it, including regular meetings with his teacher and that he can take tests orally to show what he knows, school books to keep at home or at least that he be allowed to bring his home. If he doesn't then the first step will be to get him one.
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Post by katiekat on Oct 9, 2008 11:37:57 GMT -5
Is your son currently taking any meds? My son is currently taking Abilify and Trileptal and I know that if we stopped them he would not be able to function in school at all. Although he definitely still struggles the meds have made a world of difference. I know how hard it is to watch your child suffer through school, both academically and socially. We have also had a difficult time getting help from the school and are now having him privately evaluated. Have you ever requested an evaluation?
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Post by jj on Oct 9, 2008 11:57:32 GMT -5
Milissa, I'm so sorry you are at your wits end. Hugs to you.
I'm assuming your son decided he doesn't want to take his meds? Do they make him feel like he is not himself? I guess I'm curious about that because maybe there is another med you can he could try that he would feel good about taking, assuming that is the problem. Just a thought.
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Post by jfla on Oct 9, 2008 19:29:27 GMT -5
Hi Mellissa Your son sounds like such a bright person. I hear your frustration in trying to get his needs met. the fact that he is so bright makes it difficult to get public schools to understand his special needs and get tested. We ended up paying for testing and in so doing could prove that he deserved a 504. What also helped was when a new vice principal came in with a sympathetic ear and a 504 for my son. Your son's writing sounds like the way my son's used to look! We ended up getting him an Alphasmart for note taking or writing. We paid for it to avoid the fight and delay with the district. It was a lifesaver for him. Lots of folks have already offered good advice so I send hugs your way.
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mellissa
New Member
Very blessed mother[ss:Lilac dreams]
Posts: 12
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Post by mellissa on Oct 9, 2008 21:34:20 GMT -5
Thanks for all the helpful advice. No he does not have an IEP or a 504. I have asked for this repeatedly since he was in the sixth grade. They offered one for his asthma but not for his mental disorders. He is a very bright child and can do anything. His tests show he is advanced in most subjecfts he is just having trouble communicating that i writing. This in turn is causing him to fail. I have another meeting with the counselor at his high school and then with his therapist on the 24th. I love him a lot and know what he is capable of are there any type of scholarship programs for homeschooling him Just curious. His teachers are not very sympathetic at all and if one more teacher tells him to sit down and shut up I might not be so sympathetic to them LOL Yes I am trying to laugh about all this. Thnaks for all the support i really do apprecitae it.
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Post by misty on Oct 9, 2008 21:42:20 GMT -5
A child can be gifted & Learning disabled at the same time. If I were you I'd have him tested for learning disabilities. It sounds like he may have a language arts LD. My daughter had one too & she had similar problems. Once it was identified & she received an IEP & the proper help, she over came it. It took her a few years, & she still hasn't overcome the math LD, but she's progressing there too since she's getting the help she needs.
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Post by charliegirl on Oct 9, 2008 21:44:31 GMT -5
Has the school done an evaluation? If so, how long ago? If he hasn't had one recently you need to request one in writing and either send it return receipt requested or take that and your copy in and have whoever you hand them to sign and date it. Keep copies of his work, both the good and bad so you can show what he can do and what he is struggling with. If there is an area of suspected disability, the school is bound by IDEA law to evaluate him. Check out www.wrightslaw.com/ . I think you will be pleasantly surprised at just how much the law is on your side.
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mellissa
New Member
Very blessed mother[ss:Lilac dreams]
Posts: 12
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Post by mellissa on Oct 12, 2008 20:55:09 GMT -5
Thanks guys for all the help. The meeting went well at the school. I think I shocked the counselorLOL. She looked very surprised that I even knew that under IDEA law he is entitled to an IEP. They are going to test him further and then meet with all his teachers. Now I have one more question and I certainly hope someone can help me-- We are having a problem with violence.James has been in several fights in the last nine weeks and of course they are never his fault. We have done anger management and he was doing really well and then all of a sudden he took a turn. Any words of advice on this matter. I LOVE YOU GUYS YOU HAVE BEEN SO HELPFUL TO ME.THANKS A BUNCH FOR HELPING ME SAVE MY SON.
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Post by charliegirl on Oct 12, 2008 21:05:54 GMT -5
I really wish I could help you with that but I am going through the same thing with my son. He was actually caught bullying another kid after hating being bullied for years, he did it to someone else! argh!
I think all the years of frustration and problems with social skills is really getting to them at their age and when you combine that with puberty, watch out!
We are talking to a psych and trying to figure out how we can get him to one. I work evenings, he isn't allowed to miss school for them and we only have one car. I really think they need to talk to someone and be able to vent, plus get some ideas that will help them. Mom and Dad just aren't smart enough when you are a teen. Somehow we get really stupid for a few years, starting about now. Fortunately it doesn't last and we can have our brains back when they are older. ;D
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