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Post by lcdc1 on Dec 17, 2007 15:58:20 GMT -5
I am a great person, but sometimes my impulsiveness or whatever associated with ADHD allows me to become so mad at really stupid things sometimes!! I try really hard and am successful most of the time at squashing this, but when I let it get too far I cannot seem to bring my temper back to "normal" levels and end up having to clean up messes I create from letting that beast out!!
I have been told tricks and things to do to keep it at bay, but it is not working right now! Does anyone else ever experience this problem and do you have a successful way of killing the anger?
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Post by puzzled on Dec 17, 2007 17:39:00 GMT -5
I don't have any experience personally, lc, but my husband and adult daughter struggle with this as well. Hubby has gotten LOADS better since meds, but daughter is unmedicated, and her anger over silly things is a major issue....
I truly believe it IS the ADHD that contributes to it though.
What kinds of strategies do you know that are not working?
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Post by lcdc1 on Dec 17, 2007 19:38:25 GMT -5
yes, mine has gotten a little better with medication too. The most recent method of stopping this anger thought process for me that my physc asked me to try is the rubber band on the wrist. If I find myself getting stuck in the negative or angry thought block that will not go away, I snap the rubber band on my wrist (not too hard, just enough to take my attention there) and say out loud to stop the behavior (and I say what it is), then I have to say that I my anger is under control and getting better everyday! Sounds wierd and I can do it without the rubber band now most of the time - the trick is you snap it or say the phrase until your mind is locked into that, then you get a visual on whatever you are currently doing and really focus all your energy on that!
The other one I know about is similar in that you count to 10 or something. That is all I know.
I am not angry all the time, anymore. It is just that when it sneaks in on me, my mind is conditioned to go there and I am trying to break and change that conditioning!! It is tough at times and I get mad at myself for the lose of control.
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Post by lcdc1 on Dec 19, 2007 14:41:07 GMT -5
something else I learned today is that anger is like all these negatively charged bricks that we all carry around and if we do not deal with them in a constructive way the load of bricks gets too heavy and then the rage may come out on one issue of little significance but really is representing all those bricks from issues not dealt with before! HUHM.
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Post by charliegirl on Dec 19, 2007 15:21:13 GMT -5
You have that right Lc!
I have to admit that I tell people off in my mind and/or tell God about all the aggrevation. I have also been known to vent to friends. Getting it out of my system in one of those ways helps me.
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Post by lcdc1 on Dec 19, 2007 16:41:11 GMT -5
You have that right Lc! I have to admit that I tell people off in my mind and/or tell God about all the aggrevation. I have also been known to vent to friends. Getting it out of my system in one of those ways helps me. well, you need to share how you keep it in your mind and that it does not run out of your mouth and escalate? That means that you must be able to think about it quickly, process it, and then chose to act or not? I am working on that by trying to identify the physical signs that lead up to anger, such as tense muscles, and such so that I can then say, You know what I am feeling irritatted or angry and then break it down from there. The trick is that all this has to go through your mind in a few seconds or faster! |
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Post by charliegirl on Dec 19, 2007 17:48:26 GMT -5
Thats where having an older brother came in handy. I learned at an early age to walk away rather than get back in his face. It was much less painful.  I do still blow at times but not very often and then its after a certain person or situation has been making me angry for a very long time. It took me 2 years before I blew up at my son's teachers but after I did, I felt better. Of course, if I had to take something to my son in school, the greeter started having me leave it with her so she could have him pick it up rather than having me take it to him as I always did prior to the memorable meeting.  We had a meet the teachers night later that same year and my son's teacher, who was at the meeting, practically hugged another teacher while she was talking to me. It didn't do any good for me to blow. They just decided I was a hot head and went on doing their game playing. |
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Post by lcdc1 on Dec 20, 2007 10:51:01 GMT -5
so true, I have been labeled a hothead or out of control before, not fun.
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Post by John on Dec 20, 2007 11:41:01 GMT -5
LCDC ~ I know some people will think ''Oh here he goes again'', but have you ever looked into therapy, especially CBT/Cognitive Behavior Therapy ? It helps you 'Train Your Brain' by helping you among other things, realize how much of our 'thinking' is many times just an automatic response to some other(s) unresolved conflict(s).
Whether one has ADD or not it is a useful tool to help you gain the reins of you life.
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Post by lcdc1 on Dec 20, 2007 13:29:04 GMT -5
I visit a physcologist each week for an hour and a half!! Yes, he is working on it and a lot of other stuff right now, I am just a bundle of issues!
The guy I see is a specialist in ADHD and that is where a lot of the tips I am sharing with all of you come from. The guy I see also has ADHD and his information, input and all has been helping. I don't know what kind of therapy it is that I am in is called but we do talk about thought processes a lot. He talks to me about the choice of words I use a lot in talking about action items.
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I was about to conquer the world but then I got distracted by something shiny.
