Day 3

[lostmyshoe]

Hi KK,

Just wanted to let you know I was thinking of you and hoping this is a better week and that the info the girls gave you will help too. Hugs to ya!

[kellyh]

God....if I could, I would try to help take some of the pressure off of you. Because anyone under that kind of stress is going to snap....and I prefer to read about you in here....not in the newspaper or on www.msnbc.com!!!!! I'd send you up some "real" coolers from Canada with some "real" alcohol (come on...tell me how you get vodka from malt???) but I don't think it would be enough....and then you'd have to deal with a hangover, too!!!

SOME lawyers give a 1/2 hour of the first consultation free. Not all do, but you can always inquire if they do. All they can say is no. Ask how much they charge if it goes over the 1/2 hour. Maybe it's not as much as you think. If you find one that does do free consultations, have a script ready with exactly what you want to say and all the questions you want answered.

I hope you can get an advocate...and for free!

[katiekat]

Day 6...A mom came up to me after school and told me her daughter came home upset because Sean was being mean to her and kept picking her up. She asked him to stop, tried walking away but he followed her and kept doing it. This was all confirmed by Sean. Yes, she asked him to stop,yes she walked away, yes he kept right on doing it. We had the whole "keep your hands to yourself" conversation again.
Day 7...Yesterdays conversation forgotten. The same mom called me and said today at lunch recess Sean was kicking,punching, and poking her daughter because he wanted to be last in line. Hmmm sounds familiar. Yes he said he did these things. Now this is a very very nice mom who I like a lot. I am concerned about what will happen when he does it to a not-so-nice mom's kid. Where is the supervision on the playground? He can not just be out there without someone really keeping an eye on him. It worries me that one day he will really hurt somebody. I think tomorrow I am going to call the guidance counselor and bring it to her attention. Once again I am trying to be proactive and preventative and I'm sure nothing will be done
He also stole some dice from his classroom today.

[misty]

What is up with these schools lately? On another board a mom was complaining about no playground supervision too. Our district got rid of 200 support positions this year, playground & lunch monitors included! It makes me so mad!

[charliegirl]

Document it each and every time you are aware of it KK. Also, send a letter to the psych rather than making just a phone call. You can call but follow up with a letter of understanding and ask that it be put in his permanent file. This will come in very handy in the future.

Tell the mother you are trying to get the school to recognize that Sean needs more help learning to control his behavior there and ask her if she will back you up if necessary. I'm also thinking that having her send you a letter about it would help. Its confirmation. You could send a copy of it to the school with a comment from yourself on it and ask that they put that in his permanent file also. I suggest making a notation to whoever you are sending it to on the actual letter from her so your note has to be added to the file since I'm not sure whether they would have to add it otherwise.

If you end up in due process those will go a long way toward proving the school knows and ignores his needs. It may also be something you can use when its time for an IEP to get him a one on one aide.

It stinks that you have to go through this but you are getting into a great position to get action very soon.

[puzzled]

misty said:

What is up with these schools lately? On another board a mom was complaining about no playground supervision too. Our district got rid of 200 support positions this year, playground & lunch monitors included! It makes me so mad!

On the playground and on the bus were the two places that Chase had issues too. Both places where there are lots of kids and not enough supervision....he was on the other end of it, usually, getting picked on, then retaliating, but still....they need to be supevised better.

[katiekat]

CG-Good idea. I am still going to call but will follow up with a letter. What specifically should I say in the letter? Just that I spoke to so and so about the situation and I wanted to document it?

[charliegirl]

I would tell them that this child's mother approached you about your son's behavior and tell what occurred, then list the dates of each incident. I would then request they do a behavior assessment with the goal of setting up a behavior intervention plan. I'd also ask them to alert whoever is in charge of the children when he is acting up to be vigilant and step in immediately, as you are afraid Sean will hurt someone and are also concerned that he not be allowed to bully others. Once you have done that, just ask them please put this in his permanent file.

You will need to name the girl and her mother as they will probably want to talk to them to get their side of things and verify that it happened.

Make sure you keep a copy for yourself. I would also send it return receipt requested so you have proof they did recieve it. You could take it in personally but if you do, make sure you have a receipt made out for whoever you hand it to, to sign.

[katiekat]

Okay-for some reason Im having trouble copying and pasting but I read in one of the links you sent me CG, that once a referral has been made the school "may not attempt to make interventions in the regular school program first." Well I ran into the guidance counselor when I was dropping off Sean's meds and she told me that for now until they figure out what they're going to do Sean will have a "shadow" with him during lunch and recess. It will be one of the lunch aides. Aren't the doing exactly what it says they are NOT allowed to do?

[charliegirl]

They didn't say they wanted to try a shadow instead of doing an assessment so I'm not sure. I do think the shadow is a good idea though, so I wouldn't fight it at this time.

I think that if you haven't sent in a report to the state DOE, you should get one in ASAP. The school may be starting to take things seriously but this could be another stall tactic. Sean can't afford for you to let them stall yet again. The shadow is good for lunch and recess but he needs some serious intervention in his education also before he loses more ground.

I'm so glad he is getting the shadow. Its a step in the right direction and hopefully, she will be able to help him learn better social skills.