Day 3

[katiekat]

...and here we go again. Sean has once again started his hitting in line at school in the morning. You might remember this was a huge problem last year. Today he decided he wanted to be last in line so every time I kid came and had to stand behind him he told them to get in front of him. When they didn't he would push and hit them and growl at them. Yes I said growl. A teacher came over and told him to stop and he growled at her too. She pulled him out and spoke to him but then as soon as she walked away another kid was behind him so he started pushing him and when the kid put his hands up to protect himself Sean grabbed his hands and bent them back until the other little boy went down on the ground. I don't want to deal with this again!!!

[lostmyshoe]

Hey KK,

So sorry to hear there were problems with Sean. I sure hope he will adjust and things can be worked out. I can understand how frustrated you feel. I'm exhausted from worry and lack of sleep myself. I'm on Day 2 here. Day 1 was a disaster. After being picked on last year Becca was so afraid of it happening again she went to Guidance and had a melt down after she saw that some of the girls that picked on her were in one of her classes. I had to leave work and pick her up from school. We are in the process of getting that class changed and hoping that will help. All I can do is pray that I won't get a call today. Keeping you in my prayers and hoping tomorrow will be a better day with Sean. Hugs to ya.

[charliegirl]

KK, have you asked that he have a personal aid for school? It can be put in is IEP that he have one for certain times or the entire day, whichever is most appropriate. Maybe he could have one for the times when he is known to act up the worst. The aide could help him through the social maze also by keeping him in check during lunch and recess.

[katiekat]

LMBO about the aide comment CG-they won't even evaluate him. He does not have an IEP or a 504. We requested it twice last year (in writing,followed all the procedures) and were denied. They would never do that. They don't have ANY aides at the school-everything that most schools use an aide for parent volunteers do.

[charliegirl]

You really need to get an educational advocate, possibly an attorney. It they are accepting federal funds, they have to comply with the law.

Sorry, for some reason I was thinking that you finally got an IEP. It must have been wishful thinking on my part. Its very obvious that he needs one.

It would be best if you can get an advocate or attorney who could get them to do a good IEP before you move since it will follow you. Does the district you want to move to have any kind of reputation for working with Sped? That move could end up being what saves him and saves your sanity.

[puzzled]

I am so shocked that he does not have something for behavioral issues....my school was talking about it when chase had 2 playground scuffles and a bus incident last year, but his guanfacine helped that problem, so it was not needed.

If I were his teacher, I think I would position myself near him whenever I knew he was going to be problematic....like now, whenever I had them line up, I would keep him with me...hold his hand, have him hold some 'important' paper for me.....something to fend off the behaviors....

[jj]

KK, I'm with Charliegirl on the advocate. You need one and it wouldn't hurt to tell them you are looking for one because your son needs an IEP. That may get them to see things your way.

I am so sorry this happened.

[katiekat]

Can anyone tell me how to go about getting an advocate?

[misty]

katiekat said:

Can anyone tell me how to go about getting an advocate?

Try the yellow pages for kids. They have listings by state for educational consultants, psychologists, educational diagnosticians, health care providers, academic therapists, tutors, speech language therapists, occupational therapists, coaches, advocates, and attorneys for children with disabilities.

www.yellowpagesforkids.com/

[katiekat]

Right now Im just so frustrated I want to scream. I am thinking back to last year and all I have done to try and help Sean and I realize that I have accomplished ABSOLUTELY NOTHING!!! Lets start with the school: I am not a stupid person, I have another older child who's never had a single problem in school so I know this isn't "typical" or "normal", you guys have given me a bunch of great ideas but nothing I say to those people matters. So one year later he is still hitting, pushing, and just being out of control. Next, doctors: We have been to 1 psychologist, 2 psychiatrists, a neurologist, and that outpatient program and nothing, no improvement. Two medications that do nothing and on top of that the psych said to stop the Atarax and didn't renew the RX and now Sean is up again during the night. Last, home: I have put more effort into this than I can begin to explain. Nothing works. I have gotten a lot of great suggestions from you guys that have worked for your kids but mean nothing to Sean. Punishment,rewards, charts, talking to him, nothing has any effect. He is in the same exact spot he was a year and a half ago when I started on my quest to help him. I have made no progress. HE has made no progress. His behavior puts a very big strain on my relationships with my husband and my son. My son does not deserve to live with this, my son is not a problem,my son is in 6th grade and I have never had a meeting,gotten a phone call, or heard a single complaint about his behavior. I would never believe a year ago that I would make comments like this today. I have always treated Sean like he was my own child. It's just getting so tiring because we have not moved one step forward. If I saw even the tiniest improvement I would feel encouraged...but I haven't. I am sorry I am being so negative and angry but that's how I feel right now, and if there's anyone that understands I know it's all of you. So thanks for letting me vent.